#42 [Journey to Scratch] Pressure to Perform, Slowing Down, and Humbling Observations from My Past Two Rounds

The Golf Hypnotherapist (00:02.486)

Hey fellow golfer, welcome back to another episode of the Scratch Golfers Mindset podcast. I’m your host, I think finally no longer a triple digit golfer. To be to be determined, we’ll see. But I’m your host, Paul Salter, the golf hypnotherapist and thrilled to have you tuning in on another Tuesday when I document my own journey to scratch. And we’ve got a lot to recap from this past week

a lot of humbling learning lessons to say the least coming off my low round of our lifetime low round of an 87 and finally putting my big boy pants on and playing back from the blue tees ever since and I’m excited to dive in and to be incredibly vulnerable and humble as I share what went well and what didn’t go so well. But before I begin just a quick announcement something to put on your radar.

I have locked in and confirmed one, two, three, four, five speakers for the first ever virtual mental game of golf summit, which will be happening again. It’s virtual Saturday, January 25th. Don’t worry. It’s not a playoff football day. College football playoffs are already complete and the NFC and AFC conference championship games are on Sunday, January 26th. So

Saturday, January 25th, it’s gonna be an all day affair. Like I said, I’ve got five speakers and then myself. So six total already committed, lined up to speak throughout the day. A lot more information to come, but really excited to share these phenomenal guests, many of which you already know, with you in a capacity unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before. And I know for many of you, this will be smack dab in the middle.

of your off season. It’s too cold to play, the courses are closed. This is an intentional timed event. I’m so excited to help not only spark the flame and fire of excitement and passion for the game as the off season begins to come to a close in January, but to really provide you with tangible takeaways to work on your mental and emotional game. that way, whenever your 2025 playing season begins,

The Golf Hypnotherapist (02:22.744)

You are in a better position than ever before to make playing to your potential a habitual practice. So stay tuned more to come the virtual mental game of golf summit, January 25th, 2025. Well, with that said, wow, to be frank, I was humbled this past week and I got two rounds in a quick round of nine on Tuesday morning and then a round of 18 on Friday.

And the round of nine is noteworthy for many reasons. I don’t have my scorecard in front of me. I shot a 48. To be frank, I didn’t hit the ball well. I scrapped by. I had to grind out some bogeys. And to be frank, that’s part of the game. Learning how to score even when your best shot isn’t there, you’re not playing to your potential is an aspect of the game.

of the game that I continue, I need to continue, excuse me, cultivating and strengthening. So that was definitely on display. I’m proud of some of the mental resilience, the grit and patience I showed, but what I’m most proud of for that round, which is what we’re going to unpack in this conversation, is the after round reflection. So let me set the scene for you. I show up nine or 9.30 in the morning, tee time, plan to play as a single. get matched or I get paired with another gentleman who then

the two of us get paired with another two some. So three strangers is who I’m playing with. And this is really noteworthy for me. Because as I’ve mentioned in previous episodes, I do struggle with whether you want to call it expectation, pressure, false sense of urgency, need to perform, perfectionism, that whole laundry list of not playing my best under pressure has plagued me in the past. And I’ve done really well.

not only playing with strangers and new people of all different skill levels, but I’ve also done really well on a personal note, befriending some of these playing partners so that now, know, my buddy Aaron, my buddy Rob, who I’ll elaborate more on who I played with Friday, these are people I’ve met randomly, got paired with randomly, who have now become regular playing partners, especially my bud Aaron, who I’ve probably played six, seven, eight rounds with at this time. So I’ve learned to step into that discomfort by creating familiarity and comfort.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (04:46.392)

almost to a detriment. And what I mean by that is I have neglected putting myself in more uncomfortable situations on the golf course. And with the focus and intention in 2025 being to play consistent tournament golf, that needs to change. It’s wonderful to go out and play with your bros, your best friends. But for me, I need more experience in those

situations where I don’t know anybody and for some reason I face this self-imposed pressure because I need more repetitions and experience to fusing it. So the reason I share that with you is again three strangers the guy who I’m paired with and driving around with he’s a stud. I think he probably shot 39 or 40 on the front nine just a high quality golfer really really good. I think he said his handicap was between six and eight. The other two guys it turns out one of them I’d actually met before when I had visited

the BNI or business networking international chapter he was a part of ultimately joined another one, but we recognized each other and by the second hole, we were finally like, hey, did you, yeah, and you know, we connected the dots, we knew each other. So there was a little bit of familiarity, but really that round I would describe as rushed. I was failing to execute my routine. I got caught in a mental pickle, trying to be personable, friendly.

deep down trying to be liked and respected amongst my peers in that playing group, which as you can imagine was a massive energy drain that took me away from playing focused, confident and committed golf. I undulated between striping the ball, completely topping the ball. I might’ve topped in nine holes. I might’ve topped six shots in that round. It was ugly.

to say the least. And really the biggest takeaway was I created this false sense of urgency, this false sense of pressure. And what I’m disappointed and yet simultaneously proud in is that the two some that got paired with me and the gentleman asked, do you want to play from blues or whites? And I was able to muster with conviction, I want to play from blues today. And I was proud of myself for that.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (07:02.722)

But that was the kind of the extent of my conviction and confidence. Everything else got lost in uncertainty, a lack of presence throughout the round, throughout each hole and each shot. And really it showed for me that my area of growth is to stop fucking caring about who I’m playing with, trying to impress other people. And let’s be honest, you know this.

I know this. I’ve worked on this in every area in my life outside of the golf course and a little bit on the golf course. But this round of nine holes really showed me how quickly I can become distracted and consumed by the opinions, thoughts and presence of other people. And just to be very frank, that needs to change ASAP. I need to fix that by not only digging in and releasing some of this pressure and expectation that self-imposed,

but also need to continuously put myself out there with strangers, people I have not played before, start raising the stakes metaphorically, if you will, so I can become resilient and numb to the external situations around me and find a better job of cultivating presence, focus and confidence on demand. Because I’m seeing flashes of my potential left and right. I’m playing well, I’m hitting the ball well.

when I slow down and focus on my processes, duh, right? That’s the biggest takeaway for me. It’s been the theme of my life, the theme of my golf story thus far is slow down. And as a note to you, something I found helpful that’s empowered me and enabled me to slow down is speaking out loud to myself, whispering.

everything I need to be aware of as I’m starting to set the scene for the shot. So noticing the lies, the clean lie or a tough lies and uphill downhill, left, right, etc. And just going through those starts to help settle me and slow me down as I’m standing behind the ball and assessing the situat situation there in my think box. By the time I step in my play box, I then have started gravitating towards the affirmation slow is smooth, smooth is fast. It’s safe to slow down.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (09:15.702)

and just really starting to bring my attention and awareness to the power of slowing down.

So how did I fare as I took that awareness, complimented it with action, and brought it into Friday’s round of 18? So Friday’s round was played with my good friend, Rob, who, like I mentioned, I met him getting paired randomly on the golf course many months ago. This is probably our fifth round together, maybe fourth, but someone who’s become a friend, we talk and text away from the course, really, really good dude.

So I want to go through some of the details of this round because Rob hadn’t played with me in a little while. It probably been four to six weeks and he made the comment several times throughout the round. Like it’s evident you’ve been putting the reps in the practice in like I was hitting the ball well. My swing was confident in control and first hole striped my drive down the middle. Second shot landed on like the cut between the fringe and the rougher on the green. Great shot. Chips.

to about 10 to 12 feet, missed the putt, so bogey number one. Second shot is a harsh dog leg par five, striped the five wood down the middle, I don’t know, 220, 230, topped the ball. Then I hit my next one right where I needed to be just short of the green, ended up getting on making bogey again. So we’re starting bogey bogey on the front nine. The first three holes are the three toughest holes in the golf course by multiple people’s accounts.

I’m not sure about mine, but many people have told me that. So starting bogey bogey is great. The next hole business as usual hit the fairway just came up a little bit right of the green chipped on to putted so we’re plus three through three. We’re right where we envision ourselves and expect ourselves to be the next hole is the fourth hole. I push my drive out of bounds. Still battle back make a double on that hole.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (11:12.088)

Now the fifth hole is where I’m incredibly proud of myself. The hole is playing, I think 189, if I remember correctly. And I should set the stage with this day is incredibly windy. The windiest experience I’ve had out on the golf course. And the hole is playing 189. It’s a par three, slightly downhill. So I have a seven iron up there and I’m on the tee box. I take my practice swing and I’m assessing the situation. The wind is just.

Howling it’s against me or I mean it’s with me against my back So I make the decision to club change to an eight and I was so proud of myself for walking away from the seven Starting over there’s a cart waiting behind us. I gave zero fucks there Grab the eight stuck the ball that the green is left center or the pin is left center in the green I stuck the ball about 20 feet away from the pin on the green and then went down

to sink the birdie putt, fucking ecstatic. Really, really good here. And Rob’s playing well except on that hole, Rob has a massive blow up, cards a double bogey. And so Rob’s in a little bit of a short term funk there. I’m high as a kite. I go on then to double, double, blow up on eight by hitting out of bounds, getting stuck in a bunker. Triple, it’s my first triple in like three rounds and double nine.

And I card a 49 on the front. Not happy. Such a strong start. Let’s see here. I’m like plus three, four and plus four through five holes feeling really good. Blow up on the final four holes going plus two, four, six, nine on the final four holes. So that was rough. It was a tough pill to swallow and it culminated on nine. Nine is

short hole playing 326 that day, tons of bunkers and trees on the right very tight fairway lined by water on the left on the far left of the water is the main road and entrance into the country club. So this is unique. So I played this whole well many times I take a five wood I aim at the bunker on the far right at about one o’clock. That’s about 240 yards away hit my five wood to 2230 comes up short on the fairway we have a chance to go after the green started well.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (13:31.924)

I hit my ball, it’s on target, maybe a slight little bit coming back to the left. The wind takes that sucker, not into the water, not into the first road, all the way left into the second. So I have an imagination there was a bit of spin on the ball going that way, but I kid you not, the wind took that ball 50 yards to the left off track. So I started that one OB, topped one and had a tough time recovering with a double. So not happy there.

go on to start the back nine, bogey, bogey par, four doubles in a row, bogey, double, couple OBs, couple top shots. And in hindsight, and this is going to sound so interesting. I had a fucking blast playing that round. That might be my most fun, enjoyable round to date. I was confident, focused and present despite topping a handful of balls still. that’s a new

obstacle that I’ve really got to settle into and work on, but I had so much fun to the extent and shame on me. I missed some of my own practices, failed to follow through on some of my systems to help me play my best mentally, emotionally and physically. Meaning I had my pre round meal at about 1130 or 12. So I had a couple coaching calls. Then I got out to the range.

teed off at 2.30. The plan was to eat a piece of fruit right before I started playing and then go through my normal process of snack on six, stack at the turn, snack on 15. I was having such a great time connecting with Rob. I met a new friend on the range prior to the round, missed my pre-round snack, didn’t eat until the 10th hole. So I have an imagination in hindsight that the focus and consistency as well as the physical exhaustion

was starting to catch up to me on hole six, seven, eight, nine, but I played plus nine. You I’d already had two workouts that day, a mobility and walking one and the full blown resistance training. So I was lacking fuel. So that definitely carried into it. And then on hole 10, and this is gonna sound so silly, I’m eating one of those delicious perfect bars. But if you’ve ever had a perfect bar, and they’re so damn good, you absolutely should. When they’re not in the fridge, they get a little bit oily.

The Golf Hypnotherapist (15:51.244)

and I wasn’t thinking of it. I’m just chowing down on this perfect bar, waiting for the group in front of us to tee off on 10 and not thinking twice, I’m touching and breaking it off with my glove hand. So by the time I go to hit on 10, there is so much residual oil on my hand. It’s such a rookie mistake, I know, that I completely lose grip of the club. Thankfully I didn’t throw it with my swing, but botched that shot to say the least because I have no grip.

Long story short, I was so entrenched in conversation. I did not hydrate, nor did I fuel appropriately, which I know contributed to some of my lack of focus and mits hits on the back four holes of the front nine, as well as the final few holes of the back nine. So plenty of opportunity to tighten things up, perhaps set a few reminders to check in with myself throughout the round. But all said and done.

I did a lot of things well. hit two, two, two, two, two, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight fairways, a few greens and regulation. I putted well. think I had 35 putts, few I had back to back three putts. That’s unlike me had been a long time since I had three putted as well. Again,

A lot of little things to clean up here, but the chipping consistency was strong, still working on getting acclimated with some of those longer irons that I wasn’t needing to hit playing from the white tees, know, really working on being able to hit my five, six and seven consistently, always opportunity for improvement, but feeling incredibly encouraged here today, knowing I’ll continue really prioritizing slowing down.

to dial in my processes and give myself the best opportunity. But we’re in a great place. I felt so much more confident off the tee box. I did realize on the back nine, a simple little grip adjustment was needed. I did not have one of my fingers where I usually do just kind of getting lost in conversation or overthinking. And that caused me to push the ball quite right a handful of times. And then once I fixed that,

The Golf Hypnotherapist (18:02.048)

I was able to hit the fairway the last two holes, so that was a good little fix there. And I’m optimistic, feeling dialed in. I know what I need to practice on. I’ve got a couple practice sessions this week and then I’m playing around on Friday with one of my clients who’s actually flying in town for other reasons. So her and I are gonna get together and she plays back from the men’s tee. She’s a hell of a golfer. So I’ve got my work cut out for me.

And I’m really excited to have the opportunity to play with some great competition as well as a client turned friend should be a wonderful experience as I continue my pursuit of breaking 85 three times from the blue tees. That is the next focus before turning the focus to tournament golf in 2025. Well, that’s it. That’s the recap of my journey to scratch a lot of work to be done on the technical aspects of the game. Yes.

always, but most importantly, allowing myself the opportunity to execute what I am really good at executing by slowing down and cultivating presence on demand for every single shot. And with that said, I appreciate you continuing to tune in every Tuesday to follow my journey to scratch your little reach outs, your DMS, your, pieces of support are so greatly appreciated. And I’d also greatly appreciate it.

If you just took 30 seconds to leave a genuine rating, a review on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you’re listening to this show, it helps me continue to not only share my message coaching and education with fellow golfers, it helps me put my expert guests in front of the right listeners as well. We’ll have a fantastic week of practice of play, hit them straight, and I’ll catch you in the next episode.